Last week hubby and I headed to Home Depot to buy some packing boxes. As we swished through the self checkout, I handed my military ID to the checker that was babysitting all of us.
"Oh," she said. "I’m sorry, but we’re no longer offering a military discount."
I felt a sudden profound sadness, and it wasn’t because I was going to get 50 cents off my purchase, either.
Hubby and I have always made it a point to shop at Home Depot first if we needed home supplies. The military discount was wonderful in that it saved us quite a bit of money as I tried to fix up the several thousand dollars worth of damage to my Mother-in-Law’s home while my husband was last deployed. But the military discount was meaningful to me in yet another, and more important way.
It made me feel like someone was thinking of us and what we were going through as military families.
I did not make frequent use of the Home Depot military discount. Most of the time I just got my purchases and went on my way. If, however, I had to show some form of ID the checker never failed to remind me that the discount was available for me.
One checker in Porterville, CA actually voided the transaction and started it over to make sure I got the discount – all without any prompting or asking for special treatment from me.
She told me, "Honey – we’ve got to take CARE of you."
I have struggled, in the last five years, with occasional bouts of irritation, or anger, or despair over seeing our military family putting out such a tremendous effort in deployments, fear, and stress while so many civilian families go about their regular daily life seemingly unaffected by what is happening in the Middle East or Afghanistan. I have descended into a funk more than once when a comment I made referred to a place like Anbar or Kandahar, and the response from someone more removed from the situation was, "Where’s that?"
Just a simple little thing like the Home Depot checkers telling me that they had to "take care of me" made that all better – because someone knew. Someone CARED.
It really isn’t just about the money. No Wal Mart I’ve ever been in has offered a military discount. However, while hubby was in Iraq my local Wal Mart planned a Veteran’s Day display. I didn’t pay much attention to it – I was more interested in getting what I needed and getting out before I was crushed in the roiling pack of pay day shoppers.
But as I picked up my photos from the One Hour counter, my funk was once again broken by a sharp eyed woman behind the counter. She pointed to the Veteran’s Day poster and told me that she had noticed our disposable camera had come from Iraq and asked if the pictures were of my husband. Then she told me this:
"I would really appreciate it if you would pick one of those photos and let us make copies to add to our display. We are trying to show our appreciation to all the veterans we can, and your husband certainly deserves the thanks."
I very nearly couldn’t speak – I just selected the one I thought was most representative (it happened to be my hubby in full battle rattle under Saddam’s crossed swords) and she made short work of it. She even gave me a free 5 x7 and 4 free wallets.
It was as though God had reached down Himself and patted my shoulder that day. It felt like everything would be all right.
As a military wife I don’t really ask for any special treatment. And honestly, I don’t necessarily want it. I take great satisfaction in my ability to do what needs to be done, whether I am alone or my hubby is home. I am fiercely proud of the fact that I can pack up and clean a house in under a week (all by myself), or unpack and decorate in 48 hours when called upon. I don’t like the fact that I have to be self-sufficient so often, but I am very proud that I can be. And, like many military spouses, I have a great deal of trouble asking for any help, even when I truly need it.
So that little bit of unasked for recognition of the things that set military families apart from Home Depot and the diligence of the Home depot checkers in making sure military families were "taken care of" made me feel like someone understood, and cared. I really did depend on it.
And so now that it’s gone, I’m very sad.
About airforcewife
Comments
I know what you mean. It just seems like it's the small businesses or the individuals who always help. The big companies do it for a while and then stop when there is no more press coverage. I can't believe they lose that much money when they offer a military discount. In all honesty, I forget to ask and sometimes I don't bother because I assume they just don't offer one.
Yes, I agree with everything you said about the discounts and recognition of the military. I wonder 'why now?'.
I think it's fatigue, empathy fatigue. When this all first started, it was going to be quick, we won, flags were flying and its all wonderful. This has not ended, and it's turned into a grind. That's not glamourous, not good for bidness. I don't want/expect discounts, but I'd like us to be acknowledged, like the other citizens of this State to remember that 2600 are in the Sand and that their families STILL need help. The outpouring of help was evident at the beginning, when the news was full of farewell ceremonies, and an occasional hiccup of help during Thanksgiving/Xmas.
As for Wallyworld, I was buying dozens of pairs of flipflops to send to one of our units who were taking them to a school in the Sand, and when I asked for a volume discount, I was told they don't give discounts to military people up HERE. (like I was a disease!) I wasn't ASKING for a military discount, I thought that over 45 pairs of flipflops could qualify for a volume discount, but that's all they could see, my ID card, my "militaryness".
From what I have seen up here in the midwest, most civilians would like to forget we are here. When our BCT comes home in the next couple of months, there might be a blurp on the news… maybe.
LAW
I wonder if there is a list of retailers who do offer military discounts? I am not military, but I am a supporter. And I will spend my money (and I do that a bit too well) where the military is supported. Guess I will have to start asking. Figure I will get strange looks when I get an answer, as I do not have credentials to make it "relevant".
Oh, and I am in the midwest. I find that there is lots of support in the midwest, but not so much in the larger metropolitan areas. Sorry you do not see that so much, LAW.
Your normal, I'm normal I too feel sad when I try to make a connection and I mention Iraq or Afganistan and the comment falls on deaf ears and ignorance, or the famous line.. O I dont support the war so by proxy I am automatically evil, makes me sad makes me a little angry, I am dam proud of my brother and my husband they believ in what they do they are honorable men. No I do not want a free ride I dont want sympathy I dont want anything, just recognition for them and for the general public to know more and care enough to ask…
Sometimes when I'm checking out I ask if there is a military discount, mainly for curiosity, but also because my DH's civilian salary was 2x more than his military salary now that he's deployed and every little bit helps. Often, the response I receive is "we dont have one, but I'll make one now" It surprises me every time, and these are the stores that I return to. The following times I don't usually even ask for a discount. One time my husband used his military ID with his credit card at Chili's and the manager gave him a 50% discount. I've returned there since, but haven't asked for any discount. Like Diedre said, I don't want sympathy or anything, I'm just glad when someone cares. By the way , I am in a very large metropolitan area and I think that's why it surprises me so.
jck,
military.com does pretty good with a list of businesses that offer a discount to military personnel. I have looked at it several times but there is not much for where I live.
Sometimes I ask, especially if it's a large purchase but I don't expect them to have a discount policy. I am surprised when they do or they offer one.
I had the same experience in Home Depot a few months ago. And I was bummed, because I purchased several hundred dollars worth of stuff. But on a happy note, the contractor that we got to work on our home for us refused to take payment! It was only 1 day of work, but we were so shocked. He said that after all we are doing for this country and his family, he couldn't even consider taking payment. Soooo, if anyone ever needs a contractor in the Pittsburgh area, I know of one who deserves all the business he can handle! And he did a great job on top of it all!
My husband was just deployed on June 10th, my brother was too, they're in the same brigade. I was so sad when I watched the news and all they said was that the Govenor visited and made a speech, all I could think was "That's the news here, not the 130+ families who had to say goodbye, not the 130+ soliders who are risking their lives for our freedom? Not the thousands upon thousands that are already over there?" I also comletely agree with Deidre, I understand that some people don't agree with this war, but I can't believe how many people treat military spouses and the soldiers themselves like the enemy. We all sacrifice so much, and our husbands/wives risk everything to keep them safe and free.
I can remember times when being a military family garnered so much respect, and now it seems like we're lepers or something. It just hurts, and makes me very angry.
I don't care about discounts, and I rarely use them, but it was nice when they were offered, especially with the financial hardships that come along with deployment, it just made it seem like people cared. Like they understood what our loved one were sacrificing and they appreciated it. What happened to that America?
I guess I needed to cry tonight because this post brought tears to my eyes.
If I remember Kragons auto repair offers discounts Which I normaly forget about. I also had a great contractor 3 years ago that tiled my backsplash in my kitchen for free and did a wonderful job. Actually most of the men that worked on the kitchen did a discount because my husband was in Irac at the time. The individuals are better than the corporations. And sometimes friends and families or the worst. "you knew what you were getting into when you married him." He is Army National Guard and before 9-11 it was only weekends not tours. My parents have been great.
This weekend I noticed a lot of what your talking about. My hubby is coming home on R&R in 13 days and it's been a mad dash to every store possible to get ready. I normally never bother with the military discount because my hubby is national guard and we live so far away from any military post that most people don't have one. However in my shopping adventures this weekend I just started asking to see who really has one and who doesn't. I was actually shocked when I found out who did and didn't. I had to go pick up a summer wardrobe for my daughter for our vacation and stopped in to Limited Too. I had found the perfect dress for her to wear to pick up daddy from the airport which just happened to be on sale. So while at the register I asked the woman if they happen to have a military discount (because why not) and she said well yes and no. They don't actually call it a military discount because it's for there birthday club but it was 20% and she said they use that. I was so excited. Then I went to the tanning bed and they offer 15% off to military. From what I have noticed it's the stores such as Target, Walmart, Bigg's, etc that don't offer one. You know the big huge companies that can actually afford to give one! No it will not change my shopping habbits and I will not boycott the stores that don't offer one, but I will remember the ones who think about us!
Bonny, thanks for the info. I will check it out.
Karen, good to see that people make the efforts. And I don't look to boycott, only to make choices when I can.
Phyllis, your comment makes me sad. I have a good friend whose hubby is national guard, and currently deployed. I cannot imagine anyone saying anything other than thank you, or asking what they can do to help.
about year ago making big purchase at Home Depot and cashier noticed the dog tag around my neck and asked if I was military. Told her no, my son "was". She then said, bring him an his ID down here and we can refund you the 10% and save you some money. I thanked her, and hurriedly pushed my cart away as I swallowed back tears.
If I could bring him back, I would.
proud dad SGT Mike Stokely
KIA 16 Aug 05 near Yusufiyah
US Army E Troop 108 CAV 48 BCT GAARNG
I recently took my two girls to the beach for a few days while my husband was out in the field for three weeks. When I was told that the hotel we were too stay in, Hampton Inn, did not have a military discount. I was upset and kind of hurt. They did however offer an ARP discount, which, of course we did not qualify. I don't understand a big hotel chain like that not offering a miltary discount. -Jennifer
Phyllis, my husband is Army National Guard too. It is awful when friends and family pull out the "Well they chose to do this" card. We live in West Virginia, and there isn't that many good jobs around here. He chose to join the military to provide a better life for myself and our daughter, not because of the glory or anything like that. When my mother starts in with the "he chose it" speech, I just tell her that he chose to take care of his family and support his country, and that she needs to support him as well.
Dear Mr. Stokely, Thank you for your son's service, for the sacrifice your family has made. I am glad that your experience was one in which the retailer was acknowledging this sacrifice in some way. I will hold Mike in my prayers.
I know the length of the war has worn on the American public. I had thought that more people were touched by having service members on active duty or knowing someone who is or has been deployed. I guess that it just hasn't been 'good sustainable business practice' – makes you wonder doesn't it? Truly, how much would it have cost them to continue – we can't have been breaking their banks! As many of you have said, it's the thought that counts.
I am an active duty Air Force spouse and I live near the base where my husband is stationed. I am in a community that is supported by the military and thus, very supportive of us. I worry about the Guard and Reserve member spouses…your lot in life is much tougher than mine. You are geographically separated from each other and from the focal point of support – the base/post. This type of support coming from the community had to be incredibly important to you – even if you never utilized it! I am sorry to see it diminishing.
A weekend of support… I have to say moving back to NH away from an active military base while my husband will be away has not been easy. But this weekend I finally let my inlaws take the kids overnight for the first time and did a few things for myself including shopping, of course. Starting at Kmart to get all of the beach supplies I needed for Sunday…I was so proud to see they have a " Wall of honor" breifly introducing about 50 of our local soldiers/marines serving in different overseas duties. I was very proud of my town. Not only did they have a wall of honor but I noticed cashing out my receipt said:
"Military Best Kiss Contest" Military Members and Families submit your best homecoming kiss or hug photo bedfore July 7th for a chance to win $1,000 Kmart gift card, Kodak digital camera pkg, and be featured in Kmart's HEROES AT HOME fundraising campaign. Cusotmer across the nation will vote online for the best picture Mon July 23- Sun Aug 12th…visit kmart.com/kiss for more details.
Sounds like a fun contest.
Then swinging into Dunkin Donuts they had a banner posting "We support our troops" with flags from each branch and a donation jar to help contribute to care packages.
Stopping by payless shoes to pick up some cheap sandals…they honored the military 10% discount.
At the beach I paid for parking nearby and the man parking me was a vietnam vet and expressed his support towards the troops and thanked me as wife to stand by my husband.
I guess instead of thinking who doesn't honor the military discount we'll think about those who are atleast thinking of us!!!
Mr. Stokely-I want to thank you first for the sacrifice your family has made. It is the ultimate one and I just want you to know that I, and others, appreciate it more than you would ever know.
As for the support from the stores, I agree with those who said it's not really the discount you want but just to know that someone cares. The families sacrifice a lot and it gets so frustrating when you see civilian families who you think don't even realize that they have such a wonderful gift in getting to be together all the time. It's just seems as if it is taken for granted; thoughts of war don't even cross their minds on a daily basis most likely and that can be frustrating. Things like the Home Depot cashier just saying that they had to take care of you make you feel as if someone appreciates what your spouse does for our country and the sacrifices that all of the families make while he or she is doing their military duty. I've also had the comments of the "Well you knew what you were getting into and so did he." Not helpful. And they usually come from someone who has no personal connection with the military. It is a bit callous to make those types of comments I think and easy for those who don't understand to say those types of things. I do believe that the individuals are usually better than the large companies. I've seen a lot of support flowing from the smaller companies in our area and I think that is great…maybe the larger corporations could take a lesson from them.
if we think it's sad to offer our ID cards somewhere such as Home Depot and being told there's no longer a discount, I've got one sadder for you. I went to the bank to try to cash a check, and since my license is in a hard to pull out spot of my wallet, I used my Mil ID. It is a government issued ID with a picture…much more important than any stupid old drivers license. But then, just as I was expecting the little tube to sail down to me with my money, instead I hear a voice. "Sorry, we need an ACTUAL ID". In other words, apparently WE MilSpouses AND our IDs are not valued. How sad is this?!?!?
Aly, I had the same thing happen, went to the manager and the salesperson was informed that it was a valid ID. she had never seen one before and if you don't live in a military town, that's normal. One of the liquor stores uses the drivers licenses to scan in (and create a database) and wouldn't take our military IDs, to which my DH responded that they obviously didn't want our business and left the couple hundred bucks of picnic/party supplies right there. He wasn't quiet when 'discussing' it with the manager either. and when told that his military ID wasn't a "real" ID, proceeded to dress the guy down… it warmed my heart to watch the manager dwindle… and the applause from the other patrons was great! especially the veterans in the crowd.
LAW
You know what I say when people give me the "well, he knew what he was getting into…" I say, "well, yes, he did know. He voluntarily puts his life on the line for you. He knew he would be shot at, put in danger, separated from his family, and have to endure all manner of hardships in order to do his job and protect this country. AND HE DOES IT ANYWAY."
I've just recently become a military wife. I am ashamed to admit that I myself have been one of those people who rarely thought about our soldiers. My husband has been in the Army for almost as long as I've known him. It makes such a difference in a person's view of things when they know someone who is in the military.
Just reading through these blogs have brought tears to my eyes more times than I can count. Suddenly everything is right here in my face in ways that it never was before. I am just starting to get a glimpse of what is in my future and my daughter's future.
But I am proud to have my husband in the military.
Thank you for opening my eyes a little wider.
Support for our troops! I usually don't like to forward emails but I received this message today and wanted to pass it on. I hope there are more people who will speakout for our country.
Love This Comeback….
One of my sons serves in the military. He is still stateside, here in California. He called me yesterday to let me know how warm and welcoming people were to him, and his troops, everywhere he goes, telling me how people shake their hands, and thank them for being willing to serve, and fight, for not only our own freedoms but so that others may have them also.
But he also told me about an incident in the grocery store he stopped at yesterday, on his way home from the base. He said that ahead of several
people in front of him stood a woman dressed in a burkha.
He said when she got to the cashier she loudly remarked about the U.S.flag lapel pin the cashier wore on her mock. The cashier reached up and
touched the pin, and said proudly," Yes, I always wear it and probably always will."
The woman in the burkha then asked the cashier when the US was going to stop bombing her countrymen, explaining that she was Iraqi. A gentleman
standing behind my son stepped forward, putting his arm around my son's shoulders,
and nodding towards my son, said in a calm and gentle voice to the Iraqi woman:"Lady, hundreds of thousands of men and women like this young man have fought and died so that
YOU could stand here, in MY country and accuse a check-out cashier of bombing YOUR countrymen.It is my belief that had you been this outspoken in YOUR OWN country, we wouldn't need to be there today. But, hey, if you have now learned how to speak out so loudly and clearly,I'll gladly buy you a ticket and pay your way back to Iraq so you can straighten out the mess in YOUR country
that you are obviously here in MY country to avoid."
Everyone within hearing distance cheered!
USMC SSGT wife,
Thank you for sharing that one. Great response!
USMC SSGT Wife,
I don't know where you got it but I am sure glad you posted it here. I try not to let certain people bug me but they make it so hard sometimes. I understand not everyone likes us but then why are they here? They sure know how to take advantage of our way of life though.
Thanks for sharing it with us.
First I would like to thank Mr. Stokley for his son's service and his sacrifice for all of us. My husband didn't serve with your son but was in Yusifiyah just a short time before Sgt. Stokley.
Second, just last month my husband was in LA for training and there was a confusion on his airline tickets, he ended up having to spend another night. He went to the hotel and asked for a Military discount and the guy told him he would give him the airline discount because it was a bigger discount, how messed up is that? That really bugged me. I don't normally ask for a discount either, but I do know that Lady's footlocker gives one, I came across it by accident and it was nice, also needed at the time.
I just went to the samsonite luggage store and got a 20% discount on luggage with my military ID.
Home depot in my town still honors military 10% discount, they don't advertise but if you ask they still honor it…NH
My husband and I own and operate American Etchworks. We give all military units a 10% discount and individual military members (and their families), a 5% discount on all the products we make.
American Etchworks is located near Ft. Bragg, N.C., We've been in operation since 2005, supporting the military community as well as the surrounding areas.
American Etchworks can help you preserve precious memories such as promotions, retirements, and any other unit function. We can commemorate your deployment by etching a unit photo onto absolute black marble that will last for a lifetime!
We are skilled in marble, granite, acrylic, glass, wood and many more mediums but specialize with marble/granite. We ship worldwide and can discuss your product's layout either online or by phone.
Our website is at: http://www.americanetchworks.com
I AM A HOMEDEPOT EMPLOYEE. I HAPPILY GIVE AWAY AROUND $400 A DAY IN MILITARY DISCOUNTS. JUST TODAY I WAS INFORMED OUR STORE WILL NO LONGER OFFER THIS DISCOUNT. WE THE CASHIERS ARE CRUSHED. THIS IS JUST THE LATEST THING I CAN NOT BE PROUD OF WITH THIS COMPANY. THEY TOOK AWAY ALMOST ALL OF OUR BOUNSES AND INCENTIVES IN THE LAST 5YRS AND NOW THIS. I REALIZE IT IS NOT A COMPANY DISCOUNT POLICY THIS WAS ON A STORE BY STORE BASIS
Home Depot in Alaska started offering the Military Discount July 4th of this year but they had to stop because someone in Anchorage was going to sue Home Depot for discrimination. Kind of sad that someone cannot find something better to do with their time than harass a company who chooses to do a good thing.