That is the finding of research which was presented earlier this week in Las Vegas. From the opening paragraph of this article:
Veterans were significantly more likely to have ever engaged in extramarital sex and ever gotten divorced than people who were never in the military, according to new research to be presented at the 106th Annual Meeting of the American Sociological Association.
But it was the second paragraph that really caught my attention.
The study, based on data from a 1992 national survey, found that more than 32 percent of ever-married veterans reported extramarital sex, which is about twice the rate among ever-married non-veterans (16.8 percent).
So let me see if I understand. This is now making news although the data supporting the conclusion is based on an almost two decades old survey?
Sometimes I feel as if the military community is a huge pool of lab rats constantly being prodded, poked, tagged and observed. Hardly a week goes by that we’re not contacted by a student or research assistant or university or think tank asking us to participate in a study on the effects of deployment on children, or how ten years of war has affected our mental health or how the current OPTEMPO has placed stress on our marriages. It’s absolutely true, we do feel like caged animals on occasion.
I have to admit, I’m studied out right about now….
Although study after study on the same predictable topics continue to be churned out, I’ve never seen data this old make news. I’m not an analyst or sociologist and have no idea if it’s common practice to produce research based on such antiquated data, but I find this to be disturbing given the attention-grabbing conclusion, and I hope that consumers of this information won’t automatically apply that snapshot in time to modern-era veterans.
“To the extent that the patterns observed in these data hold for our current veteran population, the results of this study provide evidence that the concerns about infidelity among spouses of persons who have served in the military are to a considerable degree valid,” said Andrew S. London, chair of the sociology department and a sociology professor at Syracuse University.
Would a study of Iraq and Afghanistan era veterans with the same data collected in 1992 produce the same results today? For all I know, a new study using more current, comprehensive data might reveal that yes, indeed infidelity and divorce is more common among veterans. Or, it may show just the opposite. The point is, we don’t know. Actually, there’s a lot we don’t know. The release of this research now raises more questions than it answers. And to be fair, the authors of the study do admit that there are issues to consider.
As valuable as the NHSLS data are, London and his co-authors believe that their findings raise important new questions that can only be addressed with new data collection. “We do not know from these data whether the extramarital sex occurred prior to, during, or after the conclusion of the respondent’s military service, and we do not know the military service status of spouses,” London said. “New, relatively large-scale data collection initiatives that follow people over time, examine different stages of life, and collect state-of-the-science measurements of military service experiences, sexual behavior, and marriage and family outcomes from husbands and wives are desperately needed.”
According to the article (I don’t have my hands on the actual study), the sample of veterans used in this study range from those who could have served from the Korean War to Desert Storm.
For ease of presentation, the authors used the term “veteran” to describe people who had previously served in the military or who were on active duty at the time of the survey. A very small number (26) of ever-married persons were on active-duty at the time of the survey. Although the authors do not have information about the specific time period of military service, they note that the age distribution in the NHSLS suggests that respondents were born between 1932 and 1974, and therefore turned 18 between 1950 and 1992.
These eras were very different from one another. Each generation of veterans — and spouses — have faced very different internal and external environments and challenges. Furthermore, in a more modern context, I think the authors of this study may be a little late to the party.
In terms of the study’s policy implications, London said, “This research can increase our understanding of some of the problems faced by military and veteran families, and can inform the development of interventions used to help them.”
So much has changed since 1992. So very much. A decade of war has brought about an enormous amount of money and resources being pumped into marriage programs and family support. And while there is always room for improvement in some areas, as far as “interventions used to help them,” I think we’ve been sufficiently intervened…
I realize the importance of studying military relationships and so does the military. But once, just once, I’d love for an anthropologist to observe us in our natural habitat and produce a study about our resiliency and strength.
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That's kind of nuts that they're basing their study on information that came out when a lot of the current military force were still in elementary school (my husband, for example).
I suppose their information COULD be accurate, but they certainly would need a lot more information to really back it up. And in the long run, I think the generalizations out there about military servicemen and women being more likely to cheat could be sort of a self-fulfilling prophecy. It's possible that there are some people who join the military because of its reputation in regards to adultery (whether or not that reputation is deserved). It may appeal to them because they know they'll be spending a lot of time away from their families and therefore have opportunities to cheat.
At the same time, though, I don't think being in the military makes people MORE likely to cheat. The military lifestyle may be a draw for people who don't want to be monogamous, but I believe that people who truly love their spouse and don't want to hurt them (and who are willing to work at their marriage when things are tough) will remain fervently committed to each other in spite of their time apart. In fact, their time apart will probably make their marriage and their love stronger.
I'm lucky enough to be in that latter category. I know for a fact that my husband is as crazy about me as I am about him. I also know that he's 100% committed to me, and to our family – and vice versa. There's no possible way we would ever be unfaithful to one another. It definitely makes the separations easier. I'm so grateful that cheating is not something I have to stress out about (on top of everything else!) while he's gone.
thats what I thought about my first wife and me, until I found out , after returning from deployment in1998 that she cheated on me while I was gone. not only did she cheat she moved her boyfriend into base housing while Iwas gone. Idid not beleive what people were saying a month after I got home I found out it was true. I gave her another chance. told her to stop seeing the guy, also active duty, after a week I found out she was still seeing him. I went to his command which put his career in jepardy so he broke it off. about a year later I found out she was seeing adifferent guy. I found out on a sunday, and filed for divorec on monday, I spent the next 2 years in and out of court,and about $25,000 in lawyers fees and court costs. as the saying goes she got the goldmine I got the shaft.
Importing comments from our facebook page:
French – "I’d love for an anthropologist to observe us in our natural habitat and produce a study about our resiliency and strength." SpouseBuzz
I couldn't agree with you more! Many vets have come home and continued a loving familiy situation. Look at WWII vets!
Devin – 20 years old. Hmmmm. So very accurate for today I`m sure.
Sandra – I agree with the person who wrote this article. The information is old and the study is too vague! I believe that there is infidelity in the military ranks and the subject is somewhat "taboo". As resiliency and mental health have come to light so should the subject about infidelity for both active duty and spouse. I believe with knowledge comes support.
Maybe because they were more naive. Look at the vets cheating on their spouses too. As soon as they get overseas the chase. It is not always the lonely wife stateside feeling neglected. Too many people cheat on their spouses once the deployment starts and they get overseas and that is O.K., but the spouse cheating is not O.K. You cannot have it both ways. Too many military say when I got back stateside I found out that my spouse was cheating on me, but they fail to state if they were faithful. There is an old saying, “Eyes that don’t see, heart that doesn’t feel.”
Well, I retired from the Army in 2005 and I would say those numbers are probably even higher now. A third of our company got divorced due to cheating spouses or cheating soldiers every time we deployed. I had to dump mine off after my second deployment for the same thing.
I'm in the Army Reserves and I can tell you that long or multiple deployments do not cause these men to hit on you. Even if you're going on temporary duty, they think that it is "play time." It…is…crazy. And disrespectful to their wives.
When I said deployed, I meant even the little 3-month deployments…TDY also. Let me rephrase: Whenever away from the spouse…
Adultery is punishable by UCMJ however many commanders and 1SG's and SGM's turn the other cheek when they see their seniors involved in adulterious relationships. I divorced twice and both their commands knew of their adulterous actions but covered for them.
One of my husbands was a SGM who deserted me and the children while I was deployed; he decided to shack up with one of his troops. (BTW he's married to her now) When I returned from deployment he refused to tell me where he was living and had cleaned out my bank accounts.
The other bought home a war trophy and kept her in a hotel down the street while claiming he was working 20 hour shifts while others were off duty; the only reason I found out she showed up at my door and spilled her guts.
Commanders should enforce the standards and not look the other way!! They should not allow the troops to disrespect their spouses.
Commanders should enforce the standards but they would have to admit they are doing the same thing. I have to laugh when I hear the soldier's creed because that is a joke. I guess it doesn't count if your sleeping with another soldier because "remember to look after your soldier's" haha
The PRESIDENT of the United States of America ….. 'Commander in Cheif'…… Oral Sex in the White House…Adultry. Talk about standards??? He set the example, didn't he?
This is nobodies business but the ones affected. Out.
Yep, but that does not make it right.
So when is a study going to be done about the infidelity of hollywood and congress and certain presidents?
I think in our whole society there is more cheating on now, and it is certainly not a military thing…
Wrong, when you put men & women together and give them something in common, they are going to form a bond, and that bond turns into sexual often. I'm tired of hearing how it's the soldier's spouse that is cheating while deployed, that happens sometimes but as a military wife I know lots of male soldiers that are sleeping with the female soldiers in the units. Great excuses they are always away from home.
It happens in ANY OCCUPATION…. and it doesn't matter if deployed or not! Men and/or Women who are unhappy in their marriage …. if the person (male or female) isn't happy at home….it's always a possibility. Petra (above) has it correct…it is NOT a MILITARY issue….IT HAPPENS EVERYWHERE and our society accepts it. We want to get rid of God and play the evil games. Price of being human without any standards.
As DMN states, it can happen in EVERY occupation. And chances are it DOES. Our whole society is sexed up. Look at all the college kids going crazy and sleeping around instead of studying. Look at all the mothers with kids from multiple fathers. Look at all the fathers who have kids with mutliple mothers. It's "normal" now, isn't it? I am being told repeatedly that "blended families" are normal. So yes, I stand by my original comment that there is generally more cheating going on now as a whole, not just in the military. I am sorry if you had a bad experience. That still doesn't mean soldiers cheat more than civilians. They might just be more honest about it…
I think I am a pretty good student of human behavior…. My take is the "norm" is lying about their behavior. I see too many of my fellow males willing and participating in extra marital activities…. I bet the Vets were just more willing to be honest. I would also bet these guys are not all seeing the same woman either…
Valid point!
While deployments, TDYs, and moves definitely add to marital stress, I think one of the biggest things are the fact that I see so many people on base getting married young, young, young, and after knowing each other a very short time. I think military or not, being married young, and knowing each other a short time will lead to infidelity and divorce. I just see it more in military marriages.
But what's the excuse for the older and longer married soldiers who know better? These men are not naive, they plan to cheat on their wives.
My husband's last tour of duty was Korea. I was home with 4 boys-16,15,13 and barely 4. He never cal es us ones during this entire time. Since then he did some very hurtful things. Had a secret Internet Relationship with a woman, right in front of me. On our Anniversity-trip we stopped at the Paris in L.V. For a special brunch. On the sly he watched a slut, sitting with a much younger man. She noticed his interest and finally rewarded him with a performance using a banana, and I had to see his face and what it was doing to him. When I asked him, why didn't he say anything to me, he replied: How would you feel if some one at another table would be talking about you. And she performed right there in public. And Korea? Well
He told me that he would tell me what he felt like telling me. We can't afford to live apart ( money) So we make the best of it…..
I feel for you Christel, my husband had an affair with another "fellow soldier" who has made sure she is wherever he is. 5 years of off & on and next time their careers will be on the line. if you have to stay together, make the most of it. DO WHAT YOU WANT! Make a life without him. I've found that the only thing that has kept them together is sex and that gets old. Then tell him to go fly a kite when he comes crawling back for some "oh poor me" time.
Now this is just silly a silly report. There is A LOT of extramarital sex being committed by ACDU members; by both male and female military members. I used to get bothered by it but it was so prevalent I decided that I didn't care anymore about it just don't tell me to lie for you.
Well…growing up in the military i can tell u many affairs that went on with other soldiers…and most recently i ended up with an air force man that i knew for 14 years who told me he was getting a divorce from his wife…needless to say he lied and left me 13 weeks pregnant now with his child…nice guy huh? But this happens all the time and not to just militart men and women.
"He told me he was getting a divorce……" They will tell you any and everything. No disrespect intended, but …. HE was still married (until that divorce is final) and there is no excuse for unwanted pregnancy in this day…there are all types of birth control. You had a child? I hope your child is healthy, and you as well…..you could have gotten alot worse than a baby out of the situatuion.
So you got pregnant from someone you knew was still legally married and you want people to feel bad for you?
Is there a site for Moms!???
Yes to the naive ones…he will cheat while deployed…in the office during shore duty and any other opportunity that arises and usually with a bleached blond bimbo service member(especially in Va-one NC' is over the top and willingly admits to it…look at the articles regarding shuffling commanders there due to adultery…. They don't care so do your thing as well at every opportunity. Good for the goose-better for the gander. Just be sure to keep a separate bank account and bide your time as you will also get part of his/her retirement at divorce. Most spouses act dumb and just keep the allotment coming and keep doing what you do. Seems it turns into a business deal and with all the civilian spouse has to endure they deserve every cent. Report it and see you and your family homeless? It is kind of the unspoken rule but the sad thing is the innocent spouses that contract STD's from the soldier trash that not only sleep with your husband but can assure you they are sleeping with as many as they can so in essence so are you. Letting women in the military was the biggest mistake and the ultimate downfall of the military. Deployments are playtime…vacation from home responsibilities and children and no one to answer to and the secrets are always safe as most of them are doing it and usually with the same few select women in uniform that share themselves to the poor lonely deployed soldiers…sickening really so just get a plan and use it to your advantage. This is no way specific to the military but very prevalent and perfect surroundings these days for it. Not like you can get information while in another country…probably the less known the better but don't be so naive to think she is not lurking around for the ranks to get her through them any way she can and usually on her back.
Strange- My husband and I have a stronger bond than any civilian couple we know because deployments. The thought of cheating has literally never entered my mind. Maybe a different environment with Reserve wives and having their spouses pulled out of life for a year. He is a combat engineer serving as EOD so- I couldnt think about anything but having my husband home safe- not some random piece of A**. Also iraq didnt offer much of an option for cheating on his part.
I am not sure what to think. My husband is a 1SG that recently returned from his second deployment to Iraq. He is a hero, having been awarded the Bronze Star.
About 2 weeks after he left, (a year ago), he called me from Ft Lewis to tell me that he wanted to divorce me.
It was devastating to me. During this past year, I unfortunately learned of a couple of affairs that he has had. I had no idea. He violated the UCMJ, and he did not keep with Army standards of loyalty, honesty, moral courage, etc.
He has exhibited some odd behaviors since his 2006 deployment, and with a loss of hearing, and exposure to blasting, I think maybe he had some mild TBA. That may have led to impulsive behavior such as cheating, sexual addiction, etc. Just a guess.
Anyway, we are in the midst of a divorce with 2 teenage boys.
For those of you with such strong commitment and love in your, marriage, I am so happy for you. You and your spouses are to be commended for your commitment to your own values of family, duty, and country.