The working life. It’s tough! And when you multiply it by two and toss in a few kids, let the fun begin…. Have one or both of those workers be military and you may need professional juggling lessons!
People do it every day and seem to succeed, but under the surface there can be questions that plague them. Are we paying enough attention to (insert people and things here)? Being overwhelmed and guilt ridden is very common.
Every couple and family has a different set of circumstances and responsibilities so mindset is a good thing to focus on in general.
An already challenging life can be made more challenging when there’s no communication between the couple. Expectations should be laid out for everything. From child-rearing to grocery shopping to housework and emotional support. People can’t read each others minds. Not even the one of those they love the most.
If you don’t want to come home from work to unexpected company looking to you for dinner, the time to bring it up is before it happens.
My husband and I couldn’t have done it if we adhered to ‘roles’. One half of the couple doesn’t have to be the one to cook and clean daily or calm the crying baby alone. These are things that can and should be shared to ease the burden on both people. We did what needed to be done around the house when it was identified. Our morning pattern developed organically and we stuck to what worked with full knowledge that either of us would be doing the whole routine alone at times. Recalls were very interesting to say the least….
The key was staying organized and ahead of what our duties and children could ask of us at any given moment. ‘Ahead of the power curve‘ if you will. It wasn’t always easy and we sometimes fell flat on our faces, but our minds were of the same philosophy and that was comforting to both of us. It got us through classes, studying for promotions, deployments and TDY’s.
Taking the time to plan things out, speak your expectations, compromising and respecting each other is an investment in your marriage and careers.
Know that there is help for yourself and your marriage starting with MilitaryOneSource.
How do you manage as a working couple?