While making a recent daily scan of the internet I came across an article on a controversial Pentagon proposal that spouses be assigned rank. (Warning, there is some language in the article).
I realized pretty quickly this article (and website) is 100 percent satire — all the articles are fake and there to poke fun at some issues and show how ridiculous certain things can be. The article made me smile and shake my head and I got a good chuckle out of it.
They said the idea was spawned after an incident where an officer’s wife was upset when she was not saluted at the gate (again, satirical). She raised such a stink, the article said, that the command developed their spouse rank plan. The overall idea is that spouses would wear their servicemember’s rank and, instead of complaining to the normal command when something happens that they don’t like, they would have their own command chain with whom to air grievances. Spouse ranks would begin with S-1 (Spouse Recruit) and ascend to S-9 (Chief Master Spouse) and then the actual chain of command would be left completely alone. No more crazy spouses at their doors demanding more BAH and less field time, no more campfires singing koombaya… you get the picture.
How can you not giggle at that a little?
And then I read the comments section.
Instead of realizing that this funny but ridiculous plan was satire, many readers thought the proposal was genuine. And reactions ranged from irrational outrage to people fully on board with the “plan”. Most commenters began raising hell about how they would never in a million years salute another spouse or show them that needed level of respect. Personally, I think respect should be granted to any other spouse you encounter, whether it is the general’s wife or the wife of a guy who just got out of boot camp, but I think that should go without saying.
Although if we were to get rank, I have to agree with a commenter on the article: I bet we would come up with a rocking salute to use.
Now, this is just for fun people, how do you think a military spouse rank system would differ from the military itself? I don’t want to start a comment war by any means, this is purely for entertainment value.
No need to comment on how we don’t earn rank and power hungry spouses don’t need any more ideas. We all know the truth and the downsides, but play a little here. You are now a ranked spouse. What would be your main initiative? Do you have an idea for a rocking salute? How would you want to contribute to the hierarchy? Would there be an SOCS (Spouse Officer Candidate School) for those who want to continue on?
I know we have lots of creative people on this site … what would you do?
Edit: The Duffel Blog’s site is down. They know about it. We know about it. And everyone is sad. They’re working on it.
Edit again: Duffel is back! You may now go about your lives.
About Allie Lovette
Comments
i gotta admit this is pretty hysterical…and while the obvious downsides go without saying, it might go a long way to end a lot of things I find annoying about some spouses…..but on the other hand I think it would go an even longer way to divide us and make the spouse world even worse then it can be. When I think about our salute, something comes to mind a long the lines of some awesome hand slapping, high five, snapping, secret handshake kinda deal, LOL
They do! They do! They do! can't you tell by the way those family crisis keep appearing, and reappearing, as if it is an uncontrolled epidemic….. with children gone wild and most total failures due to the Matriarchal influences…..after that look at all the divorces, and separations, that prevail? Oh yes, they do have RANK that is self appointed, VERY costly…….
I would live in fear!!! Women are irrational enough without giving all of them rank, therefore making most of them think they control my life in some way,
Women are irrational enough? Ouch. Forget the fact there are women in the military but… ok then.
those women get trained to be rational.
I guess i had a weak attempt at joining in the fun and stereotypical thing, Respect must be accorded the spouse in the form of civility and being courteous but nothing more. A long time ago Officer evaluation reports were based on some scale on what the spouse did or did not do. My Great-Grandfather was a retired LCDR and used to complain about it in stories when I was a kid. I do not know any details details the stories so do not ask for defined policy. I just have my grandfather and grandmother's stories. I do collect old military books and I have seen old books that go over the duties of a military spouse in relation to her husband's career. I have never bought or read anything on the subject.
Bolton, you assume all spouses are a. Female and b. don’t have rank in their own right. I’ll take that salute now, thanks.
yes, good idea, give unearned superiority to some woman just because "well, I'm married to Admiral BOB.. and your only a "such and such." respect all the same way you wish to be respected yourself. golden rule, :)
An officer on my ship (he was gunboss at the time) told me that on the beach the officer's wives held the same rank (or at least position in the pecking order) as their husband did in the wardroom. Got to see this up close and personal when I was the only enlisted (E-5) invited to a party of young O-gangers (O-1s and -2s); their wives and girlfriends snubbed my fiance. Of course, none of the O's were cad-grads otherwise I doubt we would have been there in the first place.
I thought the whole thing was really funny, and I also think it's hilarious that people thought it was real ;-)
But I'm sure almost every COC has it come up at their staff meetings where they're like "what are we going to do with these insane spouses??"
Well, as a male spouse of 30 years, there is one thing I know for sure, the ranking would have to be based on years of experience not rank of the active duty service member. Also, the actual age of the person has to be taken into account. A psychological test would also be good. Most of all a class on how to get along for two years with someone you cannot stand. Just my thoughts after watching plenty of nonsense for thirty years. I envision some salute that has to do with hands simulating airplanes.
Love the psych test idea.
I really like the idea of a psychological test. I would like to think that rank would be determined on one’s behavior, the ability to interact with other spouses etc.
I have been a military spouse for 17 years and BEFORE THAT I was active duty for 20 years. Would that make me one of the highest ranking spouses??? (Just a joke, folks!)
Good lord knows I do not want to stray from your question but I am!
We all sacrifice for our service members. They miss birthdays, anniversaries, child birth, first boo boos , days of school and a whole ton of other things. That aside, we are the wives, we are the husbands of those service members. If we wanted a rank we should have been the ones to step up, and sign that contract. They risk their lives…for us. Joke or not I cannot even fathom what crazyness this would be IF it were real.
I don't really agree that we have to automatically give someone respect. I think it should be earned. I always say that I may not have to respect you, but I most defiantly will not DISrespect you unless you outright do the same! Respect is like trust to me; I have to get to know you to trust you, and if I trust you I respect you.
Yes it needs to be earned! Not an automatic. This is sort f what I was eluding too in my comment up top. Just because our husbands have a rank doesn’t mean we automatically get a certain ammount and type of respect. I give more respect to the kind, giving, loving Airman Basic’s wife them the SMSgts wife walking around with her nose up in the air.
I served on active duty for 14 yr, prior to MEDSEP.
As an E-3, I married an E-5. We both studied our rating manuals & took turns going on deployment, both stateside & overseas. As we both rose in rank, I got more hassle after he made Chief.
Respect must be earned on both sides of the isle.
Common Courtesy we can afford give to all.
I began active duty in he Navy in 1963. We were told that slightly earlier the Navy had initiated fitness reports of occiders' wives. We were also told that it did not last much longer than a few sunrises!
Make occiders' into officers' please!
I angered many officer spouses when I was active duty. Many would really get mad if I was working the the gate and did not salute them. I would simply tell them, if you would like to partake in that custom and courtesy; then go see a recruiter and earn it. Your spouse earned and wears the rank not you. Have a good day.
Same here when I was in. If I saw a vehicle with a Blue Decal approaching and it was an officer in uniform I would salute, but most often it was the bored housewife or their rotten kids who would laugh at some jarhead saluting them. So unless they were in uniform, tough tubas. I am not saluting some chickie poo just because hubbie is an officer.
Ever think the "chickie poo" might be a retired officer? An officer out of uniform for that day? A Reserve officer? A medically discharged officer?
There's a reason you salute because the sticker is there not necessarily because of who is at the wheel.
Fortunatly because ID's are checked at the gate, you can be sure of the person behind the wheel is military, retired, or civilian and render a salute if warranted.
Then you are part of the problem and not the solution. My mother is a retired USMC CW4 and getting gate guards to salute her is a serious issue. So, ColdWarVet75, maybe you should actually take a minute to look at the ID card, instead of just the decal, and render proper courtesy.
CWV75 didn't mention ID cards. He simply stated he would not salute a sticker.
Tangent alert:
A "blue sticker" came barrelling through SNCO housing where we reside, on a Friday evening when we were outside with several neighbors attending our children who were playing ball and riding bicycles. The speed limit is 15. This vehicle was probably running 30. (con't)
(con't)
Several of us, SMs ( with ranks ranging from E6(P) to CSM) and spouses alike, yelled for the vehicle to slow down. The vehicle proceeded to the end of the cul-de-sac, turned, and gunned the engine just as one SM's GRANDCHILD of 3 years old darted after a ball that was headed toward the street. The child didn't make it to the street because he was snatched up by Gramps, but the driver countinued coming toward us at increasing speed. At that point, several of the men stepped into the path of the oncoming vehicle and shouted in very colorful (not family-friendly) language. The driver slowed to a creep, rolled down his window, pointed at the sticker and said "See that? You know who [get this] MY DADDY is?" The rest of the story is irrelevant, and I will leave it to you to deduce why I wish the DoD would do away with the red/blue sticker thing altogether.
No, I will not be rendering anything to any blue sticker any time soon….
I would suppose that you went to Military Police Center That didn't teach you well…When Saluting a Blue (Officer Sticker).You are not Saluting the Person driving, you are Saluting the Sticker itself…I learned that at M.P. School in 1976 at Ft. McClellan…..
WHY would anyone salute a STICKER????????? Those stickers are the most ridiculous things ever! They are definitely a horrible idea and the military is getting rid of them across the board. Hey everyone, this is a really important persons vehicle! Feel free to vandalize and harass the person inside or follow them home!!
Those stickers are invalid now anyway, we don't use them anymore for force protection reasons. I make people peel them off per DOD instruction.
Not true, those stickers are required by our post in Georgia.
And here at Camp Lejeune. I personally can't stand the sticker, but it sure gets me through the gate quickly.
AMEN…AMEN….AMEN…AMEN!!!! Recently my husband had an officers wife try to pull this, so my husband (being sarcastic of course) did an about face, walked about 5 steps did another about face and started saluting the vehicle (where the officer's sticker was placed). When this woman's husband came out of his office, along with the CMC, they asked why he was still saluting (5 minutes later), he said; "I believe it is Navy custom for an officer to return a salute when one is rendered".
Needless to say his officer and the CMC about fell on the ground laughing. My guess is, this little Lt.'s wife won't try to pull that off again!
That is awesome!!! And exactly how it should be done! My husband did the same thing when he worked gates….way back when:-) I DO NOT believe that a souse wears her Active Duty Spouses rank, never did think that for 25 years. Spouses are there to support their Active Duty Spouse, they have enough to do defendinding our country without going to CO's to deal with spouses who can't get along because "The Rank Thing" among spouses. I dealt with souse on both sides of the table, and you know what I found?! Common Courtisy for each other goes a VERY long way!!!!!
Awesome!! I had a Commander that once told us at Commanders Call that an officers spouse is just that, a spouse. She/he doesn't wear their spouses rank so if they give you trouble let me know.
Not being rude but it is usually the female spouses that think they wear their husbands rank. For instance…the reserved parking spots…last I checked the sign says "Reserved for COL" not "Reserved for COL and SPOUSE".
I thought there already was a salute among spouses; something called a smile and a nod. More civility, less rank, would do wonders.
It wouldn't matter what rank they gave my wife, when we're home together she still outranks ME and that's all that matters in the end.
You're a smart man JJ!! :)
Made me smile! We have a sign hanging over the door (the mud room door that no one uses except our family) that reads "Welcome Home Soldier! Lose the Rank at the Door!" Hubs says I am House6 and I reply that if that is the case, then he is House7, i.e. "The Backbone" ! :)
I watched many a wife keep their mouth shut and fake smile on their lips so as not to make the 'ranking' wife mad or uncomfortable. The structure is there already. Who has the ear of the commander more than his spouse?
This is nothing new. I saw spouses wearing their husbands chevrons, anchors, stripes and collar devices for 24 years in the Navy. Walk into any exchange or commissary, or large department store near a major military command. You'll see them. You'll spot them right away. They're the ones demanding everything, including head of the line privileges in the cash register line — cause they're husband is so and so, or deployed.
My ex-wife thought she was General MacArthur as it was – Don't encourage her!
While I've had several run-ins with officers' wives who assumed their husband's rank was their own… the blog was funny. There are also 20 mil-spouses who selflessly volunteer on base and keep things running at home while working full time jobs for every 1 spouse who rolls up to the gate looking for a salute.
Years ago, we had a general's wife who wore her husband's stars everywhere she went on base. You couldn't see them, but she made it clear to all that they were definitely there.
Got tell a Generals wife she has the same "rank" as a SP4's wife!! She'd have you crucified!Unfortunatley, Army wives of senior ranked husbands take on their husband's rank and flaunt it, some berate staff, threaten lessers and act like Queens. Others take their position as the unit senior spouse as a support role for the other wives and families and help out, run the Family Readiness Group and support the families in time o fdeployment or great need. I knew a Brigade Commander's wife who tried to get a ride for a PFC's wife to an appt,couldn't find one so she drove herself! She is a great lady and a credit to Army wives! She made a great Generals wife too.
When hubs was E4 and deployed, I was involved in a vehicle crash that kept my grocery-getter in the body shop for three weeks. My husband's battalion commander's spouse loaned me her minivan for the duration, and after that we became friends. That was six years and two duty stations ago, and she and I remain friends…
How about whatever the rank of the service member, the opposite of the spouse. So if service member is a General, the spouse is a plebe. service member is Staff Sergeant, then spouse is a Capt.
I never experienced this on Marine bases or with Marine spouses but I sure did on a couple Air Force bases with Air Force spouses, both located where there are a high concentration of retired flag rank officers.
AF officer's wives are the worst. I was active, retired and am now a spouse and refuse to join any spouse group because of the politics (my wife is an officer). I don't know any male spouses that join the groups because of the 'hags' jockying for position. Not worth the drama.
Wearing the service members rank as a spouse, also rolls down hill to many military children. Saw that many times as I grew up in the Air Force and later in my own 27+ years career. I can recall a boy who was in the 7th grade, intimidating other kids at school because his Father was a Colonel. That finally ended, as this kid had forced a younger child to get down and clean his shoes. My brother told the "jerk" that his Father's Eagle did not cover his A** and then punched him dead in the nose. Nothing ever came of this incident from the kids Father, when he learned what his son had been doing.
I also remember the times a car would drive up with a Blue tab under the Base Decal; and the driver would demand a salute from the Gate personnel. I told my troops, that technically they were correct in the fact that they did not have to salute; but as it is just a form of greeting, if they decided to do so, it was not a bad thing. I also told them to politely explain to the driver of the vehicle that the salute is intended for the actual military member when they are either driving the vehicle or a passenger in it. I will close with this small fact, most "refused" salutes are when Women are driving the vehicle. I always tried to impress on my troops that the woman driver, could easily be an officer not in uniform, and the decal could most definitely belong to her. So again, salutes are a form of greeting, why not use it?
How refreshing to read the comments. In spite of the author's statement that this was "just for fun", some of the comments are way too serious. But I digress… My wife (COMNAVHOMEBASE) and her siblings grew up as Coast Guard dependents. Their dad was a Mustang and retired as an O-5. He was a terriffic guy and made sure that his spouse and children stayed firmly grounded.
I married the oldest daughter 34 years ago. During our courtship I left the Coast Guard after 1 hitch and joined the Navy. Throughout my Navy career my wife remained firmly grounded and kept our children in step with her simple philosophy; "Help those who need it and stand up for yourself and what you believe to be right."
She did not wear my rank or her fathers rank. She participated in the command spouse support programs and kept the home fires burning so that I could perform my job without having to worry about the neighborhood gossip machine (other spouses) slandering any of my family members.
I couldn't be more proud of her and our children!
AMEN! I love this post! Thank you for sharing that. My dad is a retired SGM and my husband is now a CPT. I have seen so many Spouses even at Company Grade level that act like they are so important!!! Even calling themselves and their husbands "Captains or Officers" …..I think that with rank comes responsibility.
I have always volunteered and see helping and educating ARMY families as my calling. Your quote is right on track for how I choose to live my life and teach my kids. I love it! Thanks again!
Awesome post, well said, too bad your wife is the minority instead of the rule. Been around the Navy, Marine Corps, Air Force, and currently am stationed at an Army post and I wish husbands would say something when they wives attempting to where their rank.
Thank your wife for being one of the few that actually understood that no matter what rank our spouses where, we are all in the same boat together!
My husband was in the Marine Corps 26 and 1/2 years and I always felt proud that I was a Marine wife and what that stood for. No rank just proud that he stood for something that I believed in. A salute was nice and respectful when I would get one but it was not expected as my husband was enlisted. When I drove on the base I was thankful for all the military did for our family.
My wife was in the Army. She filed an IG complaint against a spouse using her husbands rank. Essentially it was a hostile work environment complaint, and it held. The climate basically said by sleeping with someone of a certain rank you earned the privileged, well no more salutes for occifers wives on that installation. We have real women who serve and earn their rank, you have no right to steal it, or try to suck it off on yourself.
I like John D.'s comment above. Good people that become military spouses see rank as an indicator of their level of responsibility to help the other families in the unit, not as a license for how many other people they can boss around. So in that sense, the spouses that seek to serve also become good leaders.
100 years ago or so, I had been in the service about two years (just married) the wife and I were shopping at the commissary. They had a queue line were you wait for the next check-out person. I ran back for something forgotten and she went to the next check out person…. Whoops, she had failed to see the taped line at the end of the isle. It was not marked where or like it is now so she just did not know. It was her first time ever to shop there. I was making my way back and yes I was in uniform. I rounded the corner and saw a distressed look on her face. Natural reaction was to run to her aide as I did. continued — next comment.
Part 3: I never heard from anyone on that and an older gent waiting with his wife as we headed for the back of the line said good thinking and patted my back as I passed. The wife was shaken but underwent change from then on she would know how it all worked. It’s funny now but I still remember how it was not necessary to chew her out in front of everyone. Rank huh… I think they have enough RANK already would you not say? For all active duty personnel I thank you and your spouse soooo much for what you have done and will do. God speed!
Dana – good comments.
Michael and Mardi – no rank we are both retired now…
This is a good, thought-provoking article IMO, especially for spouses. Though I've only been married-to-Navy for 10yrs, things have changed SO much! At our first command, it was a cardinal sin for me, a 2nd class' wife, to socialize with a chief's wife. Well, after checking with my husband to be SURE I wasn't getting him in trouble, I continued the friendship. This resulted in a near-physical-assault on the ship due to the uproar of the spouses. I was BEYOND shocked that a simple friendship would cause such a riot. Our second command was shore in another state, this gave me ample opportunity to learn the do's & don't's. Coming back to VA for our 3rd-present commands, I've volunteered as FRG leader and Ombudsman & am currently an Ombudsman. Though there's the proper tone afforded to the leadership spouses, every spouse is treated as just that, a spouse, a spouse of a service-person who is serving their country. O-wives still usually avoid spouse functions, but that's the only issue we still have.
When I married Navy, there were ship spouse groups that were holding awards ceremonies for the spouses when the sailors would make rank! IMO that goes a bit too far. I'm not sure what I would actually do if this were something that ever gets past the jesting phase, I can say with certainty that it would be a detriment to the supports we've spent so long fighting to create.
Why would a spouse require respect for something their serving spouse is doing? Yes, it takes strength to be a military spouse, but it takes strength to be any spouse. Ranks are for those who serve and protect. This is outrageous.
The article isn’t real and we aren’t suggesting it should be. It’s all satirical and just for fun.
Military spouses have the same rank as there husband or wife but should they get treated differently based on there husband’s rank I think not just because your a officers spouse doesn’t mean anything because they ay have never gone though a deployment but a spc wife may have gone though 2 or 3 so I think they should get treated the same just because your spouse is a high rank you didn’t do an
Thing to get them there except maybe support
Where in the world do you get the idea from that officers and their spouses have never gone through a deployment? We've gone through 4 in 9 years and no, I do not wear my hubby's rank.
Oh man. I'm already kind of in "spouse limbo". If this were real, I'd be totally screwed. =)
I have a hard time even feeling like a military spouse most days. I have my own life, I only go on base for doctor's appointments, and I have my own full-time civillian career that has nothing to do with the military. My husband is enlisted. When I do go to family/spouse functions, I am usually 5-10 years older than the other enlisted spouses. I get funny looks for not having kids yet, and outright stares when I'm asked what I do. It's like they can't believe it's possible to have your own career & identity separate from your husband, or make it to 30 without having kids. Officer wives don't usually want to talk to me because of my husband's rank, yet I actually have a lot in common with most of them (age, I have a college degree, etc). Makes it hard to become friends with milspouses, so I usually just hang out with "townies" I meet through work.
If spouses were assigned rank, I'd avoid base more…if that's even possible =)
The next time you are at one of those functions PLEASE come talk to me. Officer? Enlisted? I just want someone to laugh with and to find where they hid the diet coke.
I think the stuffy little bimbo Officers wife needs sent to have a psych eval!
As a veteran, as well as the long-time wife of a retiree, having, for many years, seen the spouse wearing the husband’s rank, my suggestion for the spousal salute involves the middle finger, and only the middle finger.
As a military spouse myself I feel that if someone wants to be saluted then they need to join the military themselves! Our service members have earned their ranks and deserve the respect whether they are either enlisted or officer. It is all about respect! and if a spouse wants the same respect they should make the same sacrifices as their spouse and swear-in!
This is insane- crossing the line! I am a DOD worker, my husband is an O6- in no way, even with my 3 years in Iraq, do I qualify to receive his rank, do I work as hard as he or do I deserve to be saluted at the gate! Why should a woman receive her husband's rank just for marrying him??? who ever is suggesting this needs to go get their own life and stop living through their husbands/wives lives.
While in the USAF (1958-1966) it was noted that wives held the rank of their husbands. It was all ways the unit commanders wife who was the chair of the various committees that were on base. I was a lowly E-4 when I was married and had my new wife join me at my base in England (RAF Croughton). When she went to an orientation for those new spouses to the base, she sat in the front row only to be told to move to the rear as the front was reserved for officers wives.
Do you think it has changed over the years, I tend to doubt it!
I’ve held rank in my house for years! Lol! I’ve told my hubby that I am the General and for every 5 years of marriage I get another star. As it stands, I am a 3 star working on my 4th so I will always out rank him! As for other spouses I think stupidity and whininess should demote some in rank! Lol!
The rank would be indicated by the number of emeralds on their right middle finger. So as to easily display rank to another. As the progression of spousal rank goes up, so does the value of jewelry. For example, spouses of enlisted may opt for the emerald-to-diamond program.
There is a company that provides spouse award charms, in italian charm style, that are similar in design to military ribbons. I think it's obnoxious, but to each their own. The link is: http://www.attagirlgifts.com/
the officers wife who complained, he should be disciplined
the same way a pvt. would be if his wife gave the c.o. problems
to the spouses that think they should have rank, while i thank you for your support youve given your service member, dont live in their shadow their accomplishments arent yours directly get over yourself
One of my friends posted the article on Facebook. I commented: “So if I don’t show a higher rank spouse the respect she thinks she deserves, then will I be discharged from the drama club?”
Respect is earned, not given. The service member earns his (or her) respect by doing their job and ranking up.
I didn't join the drama club in high school and can't believe it continues to exist as Mil Spouses AND in the civilian work force…..I try to avoid it like the plague. Maybe we could come up with an award or trophy for those of us who don't particpate…it could be a military boot kicking a butt trophy or something where we get "booted" from the oh-so-coveted-drama-club. Bahahahaha!!!!!!
Funny thing is, it is usually the Young Officer Wives that make a big stink about it, and wear their husband’s rank. My husband is the E-6 and squad leader, I am not. I have no stature what so ever in the US Army, other than being a volunteer in family readiness. As a former FRG leader during meetings, the first rule was “Rank is left at the door, whether you are active duty or the spouse (we don’t wear a rank)”.
A spouse did not earn rank by marrying his or her spouse, an will not ever earn one unless he or she decides to join the armed forces herself. (Bless those that have to serve with rank wearing spouses…).
Now, on the subject of respect, however, I do think we should show each other respect. Whether your service member is an E-1 or O-10 (while I must say I have admiration for the spouse of a General, we can probably ALL learn something from her/ him).
If this did take place, giving spouses rank, how would they rank spouses who are veterans? I met my husband while serving along side him. I LOVE when wives (both enlisted and officers) try to where their husbands rank, I laugh at their faces.
At one of our commands (right after I had gotten out of the Navy), the CO's wife was trying to pull that nonsense with me, in front of her husband, the XO, and the CMC.
I calmly looked at her and said; "I know you're the CO's wife, you haven't earn his rank, but I assure you I earned mine." Her jaw dropped of course, she turned to see if her husband was going to say something to me, when he said, "she's right honey, I suggest you cut it out." I just turned my back on her and walked away. For the remainder of our tour there (3 years) she didn't treat me rudely as she did the 1st time we met.
Ranking spouses, has to be fictional, because it would never work without sending them through, at the very least, boot camp to understand the ranking system, why the rules are in place as they are throughout every branch of the military. Funny article, but could never happen.
I worked in an USAF emergency room during the 70s. I can't tell you how many officer wives came in demanding they be seen before NCO wives or even active duty personnel. They were quick to say "My husband is a captain, or whatever his rank". That meant nothing to me. I took great pleasure in making them wait, esp when they only had a cold but because it was a weekend and they did not want to be inconvienced they considered it to be an emergency.
HA! I am a nurse in an ER at a MTF now and let me tell you…on occasion, there is still some of that. Charge nurse one day said we needed to clear out a room quick because "We got a COL's wife out here with a migraine." My response: Oh yeah, and we all know that a COL's wife's headache hurts much worse than a PVT's wife's."
During my husbands 22 years ( and 17 days ) of active service, there were many times in which a “salute” would be rendered to me as I entered passing the entrance. Recogning that this gesture was extended after seeing my husband’s rank on my ID ( perhaps even a reflex or courtesy thing ) I always felt a bit awkward, I just humbly smiled and wished them a good day. Ranks for spouses? Absolutely not!!! One thing that I always kept in mind when receiving a “salute” by a gate guard was….”they are saluting the rank not the individual…..it is a recognition for my husbands hard earned rank that inspired that “salute” and my smile as I drove on to my business. I vouch that military spouses do have a tough job that not many can fulfill but as the “silent heros” as so called by some, proposed ranks and special designated salutes only make a mockery of spouses priorities in general, in my opinion anyways….
I have seen, lived and supported my husbands military career (now retiree) but his accomplishments does not transfer into my personal credentials for personal gain…..Where your hearts on your sleave ladies and gents, no need for a rank. God Bless : )
Shut the front door! Will they have a CCCJ? (Civilian Code of Civilian Justice"? Send them on a deployment for 9 months (to the Persian Gulf). (No cell phones, no internet, no e-mail). Only a collect call home when they get to port.
I guess most of you don't remember when they wore their husbands rank. Way back when it didn't matter if it was an officers wife they went to the front of the fuel line, cut in front of you at the PX and commissary and you could just spend the morning waiting to check out. Well I remember a General who had a NCO wives meeting in the afternoon and the Officers wives club meeting in the morning. He had them line up by rank and they tired just to hear him say "None of you have any damn rank" Yup we went through those days… The wheel just keep spinning. I do not want to belittle the spouses and their importance, I'm just saying right is right and wrong is wrong… Oh Yes not to mention when you got the letter of reprimand because you spouse wrote a bad check, or you kid did something on post they were not supposed to. I saw that all change when I was in and problems begin. Don't reinvent the wheel.. It does work.. Unless it is a gatling gun…
My husband is a retired Marine and I encountered a military wife in the job I had that let me let her know that rank had no privileges in the civilian world. She called for some work to be performed at her house and said she was "Mrs. Major——" and she had some work that needed to be done before 11 a.m. as the General's wife was coming to her house at noon and she wanted it done. Needless to say she didn't get the work done until the afternoon. Of course she called her husband and had him call me to try to get it done. I also told him what I said to her and why we couldn't get the work done. He apologized for her and told him, he didn't have to apologize, but his wife should. She didn't. My husband at the time was Staff Sgt.
I would be one of the first to join, it could work. a lot of us marry into the military because we love them for whom there are and their career but there also people like me who marry them not just for love but for passion of the military too. ( don't take me wrong, I love my husband) besides it gives us a career and something to do no matter where we move to in the military, if I could be in the military and have my husband be in it at the same time it would make my life completely. I think someone should do it, so someone sign me up.
So why don't you join? There are MANY MIL to MIL couples in the military. I am one of them.
Women already have a chain of command.
WOMEN CONTROL ALL THE LOVIN AND HALF THE MONEY…
SOONER OR LATER THEY CONTROL THEM BOTH…
WHEN A FELLA REALIZES THIS HE IS BETTER OFF..
Rank Has It's Privileges…
Bad news Bithches, uniforms/ranks don't make you who you are…iffin they do you one sad mofo !
Maybe it was because my wife was guided the wives of those who were senior to me as we went through the ranks but she always considered that she was to be a guide and help to the younger wives as I was promoted. Many a time coming home after deployment I would find that my wife had another couple younger wives calling her, asking her advice and just being friends. She took each each new wife who asked her for help and gave it herself or asked another to help. It seemed she didn't wear my rank but the younger wives always referred to her as the "Chief's Wife" in a respectful manner. She didn't need any rank. But you have to admit that it takes a heck of a girl to be military wife!
I have just one question, Would the spouse get a retirement cheque as well???? ( Now I have your undivided attention I bet!!!!) Well Canadian wives get the members retirement cheque upon his death, no SBI involved either;If Canada can afford to do this why can't America???? I would like an answer as I think this is a very serious matter. Military wives everywhere sacrificed for their country ….Canada is grateful and I wish America would show that they are as well, instead of this kind of satire;we don't need or deserve it-Many families are hurting…..have a heart!!!!
You can get his/her retirement check upon his.her death. When the paperwork is completed you check if you want 100 or 50 percent check upon the retirees death. This reduces the amount received each month before the retirees death but it will continue after the retirees death if you chose this. I will get 50% of my husbands retirement check upon his death but I hope to never receive it. Many civilian jobs do not even offer this or health care upon retirement. I am grateful for the benefits my husband earned for his 26 years of service. Maybe I understand better because I am a veteran who got out to care for our girls and give them a more stable life, got my masters degree thanks to to GI bill and went on to build my own career after they started school. Our country has been good to our service members and I hope it continues.
Does it have to be a rank? Can I be the Chief Executive Officer of Awesome or something? Maybe Empress Supreme? Salute? Heck yes!! Maybe something with jazz hands or a bend and snap. Hopefully people have fun with this article :)
Thank you for having fun with it!
Think it is satire? Think again. We have it here at Goodfellow AFB, San Angelo, TX. I was floored when at the Commissary/BX parking lot next to a Handicap space I saw a reserved space that was reserved for "Key Spouse"!
What I toke from this would probably surprise all of you… a command actually listended to something that a spouse said…. I found myself in a mil hospital paralyzed by mil doctors mad furious and wanting to be left alone and my spouse's first shirt came in and stayed even after I asked him to leave bc he said he had a right to be there… still baffles me… I can sight many more instances when I complained I was told there's the door basically… maybe a rank system in spouses would promote that spouses r people
well I got called on the carpet in 79 for tellling an O6's wife she was a camp follower just like all the rest, funny thing the col called me a day or two later to appologize and the whole time the chief was bitching he was complaining of having to do it with a straight face
Husband was active duty from 1972-1997. Our philosophy was that his career was in the AF, and I would have my own career. He was disgusted by the spouses who seemed to assume that their career was furthering their spouse's career. He wanted his success to be based on his work, not my volunteering for various functions. When he was asked recently about whether or not I participated in some group, he replied that I had my own career. Was it easy with the moves? No, but it was worth it!
Okay, I have a confession to make….My husband is a retired USMC MGySgt (mix of active & reserve) & we had great fun with my "rank" as the "Master Gun's Wife". By "we", I mean me, hubby, & most of his Reserve Unit. There was a running joke between the CWO, SNCOs & the NCOs to get the new troops to pull practical jokes on me. My job was to "pull rank" on the poor young guys & make them believe that I actually HAD rank & could make them "pay" for their little stunts. It was almost like an initiation of sorts for the newbies. Young Marine would do whatever he had been told, I'd threaten reporting him and ask "Do you know who I am??" Then after the poor fellow stopped stuttering, stammering & apologizing because he didn't realize I was "Mrs. Master Guns". I'd then give in, laughing, buy him a soda or whatever & get to know him, ask about his family, slap him on the back & say "Welcome to Your New Unit, Jarhead!" & I'd end up meeting his entire family before long. :)
BTW….we did this as a way to make the Master Guns and I more approachable, more personable. It went a long way towards making sure that there was no "rank" between Mil Spouses as we were spread so far apart being in a Reserve Unit and wanted to be able to be comfortable when we were able to get together. And I love SemperSue's idea…..I want to run for the title of "Goddess of Plum Near Everything (except Toad Removal)"
Sure, we should do it. They already control 100% of the words most sought after commodity. It would dovetail nicely with their government license to be a PITA!
When I retired from the Air Force after over 27 years. My wife was given a certificate that was the same as mine. Also sign by the Air Force Chief of Staff. I thought that was good that they give that to my wife. After all she put up with Air Force life with me for over 27 years. So I guess she was the same rank as I was. She enjoyed all my promotions as much as I did. She run the house and three kids when I was on deplorment for months and sometimes for years. CMSGT USAF RETIRED
I also received a certificate and plaque and was even called forward during my husband's retirement ceremony after 28 years of service in the USMC even though I didn't feel I deserved it nor was I comfortable invading his moment in the spotlight. I mentioned this to his CO afterwards who explained that as a former Marine myself for 2 years (honorably medically discharged) and being married to my Marine for 26 years that I had served my Country, my Corps, my Marine and my family well over the years. And then he said "Thank you, Mrs. Master Guns". I guess different people have very different opinions of spousal rank. He felt that I had it while I always joked around with it but was just really another "Marine Wife" who sometimes got to use my husband's parking spot if he wasn't already parked in it. Each to their own I guess.
At all my bases, except for the first one, Travis, we did not salute blue decals unless the driver was in an officer's uniform, or we personally recognized the driver/occupant as an officer from previous encounters. That policy was questioned by every new base/wing commander I ever had and after explaning that no way in hell were my cops going to salute a car because of some blue decal on the winshield – but rather we'd proudly salute the officer when he or she was recognized as an officer. Never had a bit of trouble with that explanation or policy. CMS (Ret), USAF
This is absolutely absurd! I am a military spouse but I too had also earned my own rank by serving this country! No spouse should be handed a rank because the other half earned it. Unless you serve you do not earn the courtesy and respects given to those that have earned it! I know there are many things missed but that still does not demonstrate earning rank! As a spouse you need to respect the chain of command and show common courtesy! Just don't think of taking credit for something you didn't earn!
My husband is in a MEU unit in the Marines and I've found that there kind of is a "chain of command" for spouses through the FRO officers and so on. And I've found that, although its not a series of ranks for the spouses to use to empower themselves, it has worked well for having the spouses contact their FRO officer who, if need be, will go to the officer above them for answers. We were told to take our problems to our FRO and talk things out with them and not pester our husbands' chain of command. Granted, the FRO's don't use their "rank" as a way to impose power over the rest of us, rather just be the one who can get the answers and responses we need. So, to some extent, I believe that a spouse ranking system would actually work and be a benefit. But, I also would say that if they were to try to impose something like this, that the spouses have to work their way up the ranks themselves, not use their husband's rank. Have their own tests and trials and things they have to follow through with to be considered to rank up.
I understand what you are saying. In the Army, it is called a "Chain of Concern" and it is simply a way to pass accurate, timely information up and down the chain and back and forth between Command and Families. It also facilitates efficient referral for resources. It works when used properly.
No thank you, I had my own rank and I have my own service record and do not want a spouse rank, I would rather re-join than have one.
I am a military spouse and I can tell you that most of the spouses already wear the spouses rank. I feel they are full of crap. In the military with the spouses it is like high school all over again. You have your clicks. No one wants to mingle with the other ranks. It like they might get cooties.
I thought this policy was already in effect when I see spouses park in the O-6 an above parking at the commissary all the time!
My father was a Navy Captain. The only time I saw Mom do anything close to wearing Dad's rank when she was the Skipper's Wife, and helped the wives of the crew when they needed a friendly ear or some other help, or was the one organizing the making of the lei when the ship returned to home port in Pearl Harbor. To me, that is the way to "wear" one's husband's (based on the odds and the conversation and my example, I know that sometimes the sexes are reversed now) rank: to help the wives so that the ship/organization can perform better.
I served as a Judge Advocate for over 20 years. One of my duties was briefing the Officer's Wive's Club on legal matters. I would ask the spouses to line up based upon their pay grades. When they started to move, I would state to them that unless they were also active duty, they should not be moving. I'd also remind them that it is a federal crime to impersonate an officer. Moreover, on the installations where I was assigned, the Commanders would not tolerate any spouses being abusive to anyone based upon the grade or position of their military spouse. That included their own spouses. These men and women in command positions all understood that they could easily be relieved of command if their spouse tried to "pull rank" on anybody.
After a long day at work, or paying a babysitter, then turning up to help organize the latest fund raiser to support needy squadron members: Thanksgiving baskets, new single moms, or the kids christmas party – to be told to line up and then sit down, would not go over well. Officers spouses clubs elect thier leaders, they aren't usually based on rank. A condescending attitude towards spouses is what turns them off living the military life and prompts them to encourage their spouse to leave.
So how would the spouse ranking system work for promotions? Maybe wives who participate in volunteering, while working full time, taking a full course load and raising toddlers would earn the highest rank, only to be outdone by a spouse in a similar situation whose husband is deployed. This was a terrific article!
For a salute, how about raising a margarita glass (full of course) to each other and a simple "you da girl" point with head nod for less formal occasions?
This is a hilarious look at a Marine Wife's response to the spouse wearing rank! http://usmclife.com/2012/07/a-wifes-response-to-p…
Bwahaha, I think I would be "honorably discharged" from the Mil Spouse league. I work about 75 Miles from where my husband is regularly stationed (currently hes actually deployed) and frankly, the military doesn't care for what I do or how I am. God bless the independance my mother instilled in me and the fact that I earn more than my husband does XD… I love me some satire and with a little imagination, life writes the best stories, doesnt it :)
Why everybody always complain about officer's wives? that happens even in the lower ranks, The E-6, E-7 wife thinks that is superior than the E-4… but why this happens? In my opinion everything around this world is like an acting show, every time that there is a party, barbecue, dinning out or whatever, all wives are competing for being the queen (what can I say, is a women thing, competition is in our blood!): who is the nicest, the prettiest…. and why not, the closest friend to the higher rank wife !!! Tell me that nobody has seeing the higher rank wife (doesn't matter which rank is) surrounded by women flying and laughing around, like everything that she says is super funny ?? I guess that for some women is a natural thing, they like power. and in the military, rank is power we like it or not, for others I guess is a way to hep their husbands careers and why not? sometimes, just sometimes they are super funny. That behavior in my opinion is the cause for higher rank wives and families act in that way.
With this comment I don't want to say that all wives are the same, thanks God !!
I've been in both sides, military and now dependant
Part 1
Although we don't have rank, the Navy encourages CO's wives (and senior enlisted wives) to be involved (there are training programs) because if everyone else is at sea, you may be called on to support another spouse (eg depression or money issues). You are expected to know the Navy's help system (MWR, hospitals, loans etc).
I wouldn't have necessarily chosen this role, but its a reponsibility and tradition. I followed other senior spouses before that who made life better for me and many civilian CEO's or politicians spouses do the same. My Company Director's wife took an interest in us (maybe not all do – but the good ones do).
Part 2
There is a lot more work and expense as a COs wife than a JOs wife and not much reward. I know – cry me a river – and I didn't have to do it – but I thought it was the right thing to do. Some COs spouses before me took no interest, and I think that it hurts morale. At one hail and farewell, a Junior Officer said, 'you know you haven't made much impact when after three years the COs wife doesn't know your name'. I remembered that and made it a point of getting to know people.
Do we need formal ranks – no. Do we have an informal role (if we choose to take it) as both leader and follower) – I think yes.
Sigh so sad only one person had fun with it.
But let me tell you I would be a Master Chief Spouse even if required a hotile take over with wire whisks at dawn! (which by the way under the new military spouse time I instill would be about 8:30 ). I propose black uniforms (just to cover the times we female spouse might be bloated and to make the male spouse look like beatnick poets). I like the Jazz hands idea but want to know when we get to convert a nice aircraft carrier into an MWR cruise ship.
If you are a spouse and all you have to do is cause "drama", maybe you should look into getting a JOB!!!! If you military spouse makes more money than you can spend and you don't need a job, then maybe you should look into volunteer opportunities. I think that instead of giving ranks to spouses, maybe we should look at taking rank away from some service members that can't handle their overwhelming responsibilities. Maybe they should look into getting a job flipping burgers if they think they can handle that!
I enjoyed the article, so thank you!
Paul — Ill re-edit the article to say that. Thanks!
Welcome! We’re glad to have you :)
So glad you found us!
It is a satirical article, purely a joke. We know rank is earned, just being playful and riffing off a funny article. :)
They are invalid where I am. They told everyone to take them off. Now if you don't have a DOD ID you just show your license and it gets scanned at the gate. They NEVER checked for decals at Bragg either even when they were "required". I lived there almost three years and drove on post everyday without it.