Isn’t it time there was a male-specific resource dedicated to providing support and information to male military spouses and their families?
Absolutely. And that’s why I started Macho Spouse, an online interactive resource for us male military spouses and our families. Despite the goofy name, Macho Spouse is about providing valuable, creative, pro-active content dedicated to helping our military families find success, happiness, and community.
I see the male spouse on Facebook, Twitter and even here at SpouseBuzz complaining that articles are not written for them. Just this week one reader complained that an post called “You Know She’s a Military Spouse When …” “completely alienates male spouses.”
Sites like SpouseBuzz do their best to cater to everyone. But at Macho Spouse we have content made just for us dudes.
There is no way I would’ve been able to push this idea out of my brain and into reality without the support of fellow male military spouse and web-designer Taurus James. Together we are building a pretty unique and dynamic website that helps military families connect through use of high-quality video production, interactive maps, blogs and forums.
Now, I could continue describing what we’ve been working on, or just show you. Click the “Play” button below to watch our video at Macho Spouse and see exactly what we’re about.
Chris Pape is an Electronic Media graduate from the University of Cincinnati who specializes in marketing and educational productions. He has spent the better part of 15 years building a solid reputation as a talented and creative producer, director, writer, shooter and editor.
About Chris Pape
Comments
I totally agree that SpouseBuzz can be downright sexist sometimes, both in it's alienation of male spouses and it's reinforcement of traditional female gender normatives for all spouses. I think it would be awesome if the Dudes lead the way in creating an INCLUSIVE group, not exclusive, that catered to the broader issues of being a spouse. Unfortunately, while this will help male spouses it provides no outlet for female spouses who are ostracized for not fitting typical female gender norms. We continue to be left on the outside looking in, neither fitting in with the macho spouses (male gender norms), nor spousebuzzers (female gender norms).
I long for the day when gender is not the sorting hat for spouses and we can actually all support each other. I think my spouse will be out of the military before that day occurs.
Thanks for posting your comment and I'm sorry you feel ostracized from the military community, as a male spouse I can relate. Macho Spouse is an inclusive group and we believe our content transcends all genders, races, branches, and ranks. Yes, we like to put a male-friendly spin on our information (graphics, music, images), but we bring in experts from both genders to help our audience navigate the challenging lifestyle of a military family. I welcome you to become a member (it's free), watch the videos and read the blogs because we're much more than guys talking about guy stuff.
Chris…your content is phenomenal. That sequestration article was so well written: go male spouse bloggers!
You should make one! I'd visit it. Homestead or WordPress are both great tools, cheap or free and easy to start out with. Templates etc make being a web designer or graphic artist not necessary.
Hi Guest — We're saddened that you feel our site sexist, alienating and reinforcing female gender normatives. We work hard to support all spouses and their modern values. That's why we seek out content from male spouses like Chris and LGBT spouses like Tracey Hepner. It's also why we regularly write about ways spouses can create and keep successful careers despite the constraints of military life. Yes, some of us enjoy traditional female roles. But this is a site that is made up of many different contributors from many different view points and walks of life — both traditional and non-traditional.
I think you missed my point when I mentioned female gender normatives. Believe it or not the core tenet of feminism is that women should be free to make their own decisions, including whether to work or stay-at-home, among many other decisions. To reduce my comment to a working outside the home v. working inside the home does me and the other men and women who are military spouses a disservice. I don't have a beef with men or women choosing to be at home. I did not say that.
However there are serious problems, which have been raised by others as well, with the prevalence of gendered pronouns and seeking to constrain men and women's choices in any number of areas. Based on your articles, Spouse Buzz believes that women need to dress a certain way, look a certain way, act a certain way in order to be welcomed into the fold. Too many tattoos, get out. Don't have a dress that goes up to the neck, down to the wrist, and down to the ankles, you don't belong. Don't wear make-up or dress to the nines to go to the commissary, it's a problem. Don't behave the right way, leave. Basically, the message is how you look is who you are. This leaves all sorts of people who don't fit the mold out in the cold.
The very same things you do that tend to alienate many of your male spouses alienate women who don't fit the mold.
But look, it's fine. I don't expect SpouseBuzz to be anything but what it is. I'm not asking the site to be different. After nearly 2 decades as a milspouse, it's what I expect. At this point I am just white knuckling it to retirement and hoping that a new generation of spouses will reshape the military community.
I agree that an all INCLUSIVE group would be better. I don't fit into the typical military spouse gender role. I have more in common wth the soldiers then the spouses.
THANK GOD!!! I just joined the Navy, and my husband has been unnerved about the whole "man-spouse" thing, even though he is thrilled with our commitment to the Navy, and we're both looking forward to it. Bookmarking this page for sure!
Chris is not only a fantastic resource for male military spouses, but he's an awesome down to earth guy. Keep up the great work!
It’s nice to see something geared toward the male spouse for a change. I’m a veteran and male spouse now, and have always felt ostrasized being a male spouse. Hell I can’t even get play dates for my daughter because I’m a man. It’s sad.
Zuessfs, have you been able to find the male spouse facebook pages? Where are you located? I know other guys with similar play-date issues, maybe you guys could start your own hangouts if you're near each other.
It is very refreshing to know that there is a resource out here that allows the male military spouse a place to visit to seek advice or just visit to read what other male spouse’s may be experiencing . Miss Vicki , seems to cross gender and does a great non bias approach in her opinion. At times I must say being a civilian husband , the respect is not always there in a male dominated military. Maybe one day we will all be looked at not only as one gender but as one people not civilian vs military. I have always showed honor and respect to our military forces . Thanks to all of the men and woman who serve. Those of us who chose to be married to someone in the military; we understand the challenges we face on a daily basis . Here’s to all of you; SALUTE!
I affectionately refer to my husband as my Navy Wife and he loves it. I will also say I'm glad that there is now a Macho Spouse hub to connect with, because I myself read the spouse articles and instead of sending him the articles (which might make him feel slightly emasculated because of the consistent references to she-spouses,) I will give him the article highlights later over dinner. This is going to be greatly appreciated by the slowly expanding minority of man-spouses :)