Happy Birthday, Corps: Thank God for Hot Marines

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First and foremost, I want to make one thing clear: In my house abides the world’s hottest service member. I don’t even want to hear you say that yours is hotter because he simply is not. I would post a picture of him to prove my point, but you wouldn’t even be able to handle it.

So let’s move on to the real subject at hand. Marines.

Today is the Marine Corps’ 239th birthday. And, as we have done in the past on SpouseBuzz, we like to take a few minutes around the services’ birthday to talk about how great it is. We celebrate the fierceness. We laud the tradition. We salute the glory.

And, for the Marine Corps, we recognize the hottness.

Because, frankly, Marines are hot. It’s not a feeling. It’s just a fact. There’s really no other way to say it. And while my own husband is the hottest service member on earth, as a rule the Marines take the cake for the hottest overall service.

Sure, whatever, “world’s greatest fighting force” blah blah blah. HOTNESS. That’s what is important.

I’ve given this considerable thought* and have determined that the primary reason Marines are hot has very little to do with actual Marine and everything to do with Marine uniforms. Ev-ery-thing.

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Need I say more?

The Marines haven’t always been the hottest. There was a minute or two there in history where their hotness sunk to all time low levels. But then, studies* show, the overall hotness spiked again. Why? Two words: rolled sleeves.

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If you recall, there was a period there over which the Corps powers-that-be did away with sleeve rolling. Women mourned. And then sleeve-rolling was reinstated. Women rejoiced. I’m pretty sure this decision was made based exclusively on the feedback of women.

The real problem here is that out of sheer loyalty I really want to think soldiers are the hottest. You know, Hooah, go Army, and all that jazz.

But I deal in hard truth and facts, and I cannot tell a lie: Corps you are gorgeous.

Happy Birthday.

 

*That’s a lie. I only started thinking about this an hour ago.
**OK, it’s not a real study. I made that up.

 

Photos courtesy U.S. Marine Corps.

About the Author

Amy Bushatz
Amy is the editor in chief of Military.com’s spouse and family blog SpouseBuzz.com. A journalist by trade, Amy also covers spouse and family news for Military.com where she is the managing editor of spouse and family content. An Army wife and mother of two, Amy has been featured as a subject matter expert on CNN.com, NPR, Fox News, NBC, CBS, ABC and BBC as well as in the New York Times, Wall Street Journal and Washington Post. Follow her on twitter @amybushatz.
  • Guest

    Preach it, sister!! :D

  • zedvector

    Love this article and your loyalty!! They do their duty with discipline, loyalty and a toughness respected in every corner of the world. They also do it on about 4% of our military’s budget! Happy Birthday Marine Corps!!

  • lifeisanadventure

    I love this article! My loyalty says a flying suit is still the hottest uniform but I agree with you about those Marines ;)

  • Sandy

    As the wife of a retired Marine (30 yrs!) I have to agree 100%! He was wearing his Blues when we met. I had no choice but to fall in love with him!!

  • ForeverNavy

    Jarheads are part of the Department of the Navy and do their grunt work. Get a clue and if Hot is more important than love and committment you have major issues and need help. When he is 90 tell him he is hot!

    • Guest

      Way to completely miss the point of the article and crap on an entire branch of the military on their birthday post.

      Look at how ridiculous inter-branch rivalry sounds: “What’s the matter, ForeverNavy? Jealous because the Marines look like men in their dress blues and y’all are stuck with Dixie cups? Or because you’re little more than a delivery mechanism for the folks doing the real work?” There aren’t enough rolleyes in the world.

      How about appreciating the spirit of the OP and lightening up?

  • Guest

    Wow!

  • Kim

    Branch rivalry is ridiculous so why the off color remark about the navy in return? Tit for tat is a very unattractive quality. Anyway, happy birthday marine corps, you do a fine job and make this country proud as do all the”other” branches!

  • Susan

    Just incredibly stupid. Isn’t the bulldog the Marines mascot? And they are a part of the Navy. But the Navy has the bulldog on the banned dogs list? Yes just the most intelligent branch of the military. Cough sarcasm.

    • Dillon Michael J

      The United States Marine Corps is organized within the Department of the Navy, which is led by the Secretary of the Navy (SECNAV). The most senior Marine commissioned officer is the Commandant of the Marine Corps, responsible for organizing, recruiting, training, and equipping the Marine Corps so that it is ready for operation under the command of the Unified Combatant Commanders. The Marine Corps is organized into four principal subdivisions: Headquarters Marine Corps, the Operating Forces, the Supporting Establishment, and the Marine Forces Reserve.
      it is not part of the navy

  • Namike

    As much as I will agree that Marines are some of the hottest around, I have to stay loyal with my Airman. When he puts on his blues… Okay, not even blues. Just an ABU is enough.

    Happy Belated birthday Marines!