Here’s What to Do When the Red Cross Message Line is Down

If you had an emergency over June 30, you may have noticed that the hotline Red Cross emergency messages was down for somewhere around 12 hours. You may have felt lost and not known how, exactly, to … [Read more...]


Why Do We Keep Deploying? There Is No Answer

My kids and I just took my husband to the airport for a yet another deployment. We dropped him off the curb. There was no ceremony, no send off, no acknowledgement that we were about to, yet again, … [Read more...]


Why Nothing Gets Done During Deployment

Dear Husband, You want to know why nothing ever seems to get done during deployment?  This is why: Wake up 25 minutes before the alarm clock goes off. Glare at it with disdain. Turn the … [Read more...]


Why ‘American Sniper’ is for Military Wives

When the husband of one of my close friends was killed in Iraq, she slipped an e e cummings poem into his casket before he was buried at Arlington. That poem ran through my mind, in verses and lines, … [Read more...]


Kids Worry About Your Safety, Too 

Kids are going to say what they are going to say when they want to say it. The trouble is I have no idea what I am supposed to say in return--especially when it comes to deployment. When I had a … [Read more...]


Did Your Combat Vet Tell You Too Much?

When you are a kid, you think the mark of an intimate relationship is that you and your beloved tell each other everything. When ‘everything’ consists of how you feel about your mother, how much … [Read more...]


Care Package OBSESSION: 8 Great Care Package Ideas

My soon-to-be husband deployed to Afghanistan for a year in 2012. Between planning our wedding and my career as a teacher, I became obsessed (and I mean obsessed) with care packages. It was the … [Read more...]


How to Live When the Military Forces a Pause

Anonymous ... raw ... lost. Even though it’s been a mere two years since our last military-mandated move, I’d nearly forgotten the feelings that would hit me on leaving a beloved location and … [Read more...]


He’s Gone: Now What Do I Do?

He's gone. Is the answer to this heartbreak to found in your own house? This weekend my girlfriend sent me a picture of her half-empty closet. On one side, her clothes hung in a neat row. On the … [Read more...]


Help for Army Girlfriend With No Contact Point

Can’t you just Google that? So often we expect newbies to military life to be able to Google anything they need to know. And they do. The problem is that when you are just starting military life as … [Read more...]


Help This Spouse: Local Program to the National Level?

I remember hearing that the ship was in “River City” during my husband’s first deployment. I Googled the term and felt even more confused. I thought, “My husband is deployed. Why is he in … [Read more...]


How You Can Get a Free YMCA Membership

If you don't live near a military base during deployment - or are stationed far away from one - you could get a free YMCA membership for your family. That's because a program that gives free YMCA … [Read more...]


5 Ways We Give “A Million Thanks” To Troops

I founded the A Million Thanks organization in 2004 when I was 15 years old. My goal was simple – to collect and distribute cards and letters of appreciation to military stationed around the … [Read more...]


Harder to Send a Son to War?

For too many years, I lived with the unholy fear that a blue Air Force staff car would pull up in front of my living quarters. The doorbell would ring, and the somber faces of uniformed death angels … [Read more...]


Our PTSD Story: I Thought It Was The Alchohol

I thought that our problem was the alcohol. I thought it was the fifth of whiskey and the six-pack of beer he could put away in a night.  Instead our problem was combat PTSD.  And I couldn’t let … [Read more...]


‘Resilience’ is a Dirty Word, Lady

Among military wives, ‘resilience’ has become a kind of a dirty word. When any speaker mentioned resilience at our Military.com National Spouse Summit this year, the crowd looked like they were … [Read more...]


3 Easiest Resiliency Skills Ever!

Now that we’ve dispelled the myths about Army Resilience Training and hopefully explained the benefit of the training to Army spouses, I want to get you started on a few skills that you can begin … [Read more...]


Losing Deployment Poker

We've all endured military spouse "deployment poker" tournaments. You know the conversation . .  . You: "My husband's deployed. It's been tough lately." Other person: "Oh yeah? I remember when … [Read more...]