I recorded last Sunday’s Army Wives and hadn’t watched it until tonight. I then went back and read SemperFi Wife’s summary and the comments. One teeny tiny thing from the episode really struck me though, something almost unremarkable. Something that didn’t make it into the post or the comments. It was during the Welcome Home ceremony when the two soldiers had no family to run to.
The last time my husband deployed, he was one of the last people from the brigade to come home, a full three weeks after the majority of our post returned. His best friend was single at the time and had left his vehicle at our house so he didn’t have to store it for the year. I had to be at his Welcome Home ceremony to give him his keys back, and I was happy to see a friend after so long.
Thus I ended up in the crowd with no husband to welcome, and he ended up in the formation with no family to pick him up.
After all the excited families went tearing across the gym, I made my way to the back of the crowd, where a small group of soldiers had gathered. These were the single guys, and since we were all stationed in Germany, they had no parents or girlfriends to shriek and hug them. And honestly, all they really wanted to do was get going, get back to the barracks, grab a beer, and relax. But I was there, a lone wife to give them someone to smile with, and a little hug to make it feel slightly more welcoming.
I really didn’t feel so great about having to attend a Welcome Home ceremony while my husband still was in sector and still had weeks to go. I thought it would be painful and bitter. But it really was a nice experience for me, to be able to shake all their hands and welcome them home after so long.
If you ever have the opportunity, I highly recommend it.
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My husband was one of those single guys the last time he came home. The thing that makes him happier and at least a little upbeat right now is that this time he has someone to come home to. When he talks about how hard it was the last time…it makes my heart hurt. I am sure he would have appreciated your hug.
I found that part to be very very sad too. I am expecting my hubby back in a couple of weeks after 14 months being gone, and after seeing that I will definitely be more aware of the single guys w/ no family members there.
I remember a gal from our unit who went to meet the single soldiers whose parents couldn't make the trip to FT Stewart (3ID). She waved flags and brought them cookies. I know she was internally distraught that her hubby was not coming back for weeks – but she was the one who had been in contact with the single soldiers' parents – and they had gotten to "know" her through the emails and phone calls. Those Mommas and Daddy's were so happy their sons/daughters were greeted at the ceremony. It is the small things in life, afterall… Thanks for sparking my memory!
Our son was one of those guys in 1st Armored.. he remembers being so happy that he got back to his room and it was clean, the sheets were on the bed, there was a package of cookies and some sodas in his little fridge. THAT was a great thing that the FRG did for the single guys.
When DH got back, he was in the advance group, that stayed at McCoy to process the returnees. They were allowed to come home for July 4 (then went back for 3 weeks right after that), a friend went down to get her husband and mine, we had a reunion in the parking lot of Starbucks… so I've never been part of one of those en masse hugs and kisses reunions.
LAW
oops – I forgot to say that our son was in Germany – out of Wiesbaden..
LAW
I actually remember that part and cried a little in the episode. I feel like even if they don't have family there, someone anyone should give them a hug or a handshake and welcome them home.
My dad was always the loner. And unfortunately, I blame my mom a lot. I wanted to be there to welcome him home, but my parent's are divorced. But I felt like when my dad arrived home, anywhere in the states, my mom should've made the effort to take me there. He didn't deserve to be alone without welcome. That and the last few times he's been the squadron commander, so he's the last to leave. That's part of the job of an officer:make sure everyone else is OK first. Sometimes he tells me how lonely he felt and it breaks my heart into a million pieces.
Because Ft. Riley is near a college town (Kansas State) they have a wonderful program where they get sorority sisters (and if needed, fraternity brothers) to come and greet single soldiers. They are all "assigned" one and they show up with cookies (or flowers, lol) and a warm smile, a hug, and a "Thank you, we're proud of you." I think that says more than anything else.
That scene in Army Wives really struck me as sad…and I was glad that the Post Commander took it upon himself to greet them.
I noticed that part, too. I thought it was really sad. DH has never come home in a ceremony like that–it's always just meeting at the airport like it was a normal thing. Since they go out in teams, there's always somebody in the office that comes and gets the single guys. I always thought that was nice–that there'd be a familiar face here to make sure you got back. I wish it could be that way for everyone.
I agree, I was also glad that the Post Commander went up to them. Dh was one of the single soldiers without anyone here during his first tour. Like LAW said, our FRG did the something similar for the single soldiers this past HC. I'm glad they did show that not all soldiers have family or friends awaiting them (for various reasons).. Thanks for this post Sarah and bringing attention to those soldiers :)
When #1 son was returning from Afghanistan, he was returning to Hawaii…talk about a hard return. For months we tried to get his return nailed down so that we could make that trip (Denver to Hawaii is not cheap!). We finally booked our tickets with fingers crossed and praying hands, other wise it would just be a vacation for us. For us it did work out he got home 3days after we got there and we got our "official" phone call 24 hrs before his arrival. If we had waited we wouldn't have been there and because of the location there were a LOT of single soldiers and I felt really bad for them until I headed to the barracks with our son and saw all the single guys sitting around with beer in hand and high fiving each other for a job well done. Sad yea but I think our soldiers are pretty good at supporting each other!:)
That particular scene is the one that kicked me the hardest this week. (I know I'm not a military spouse, but I just need to chime in on this one.)
I've managed to be at a couple of "homecomings" just because the very idea that one single Soldier, Airman, Sailor or Marine would not hear a Welcome Home or Thank You just breaks my heart. But that scene sealed the deal. I'm gonna be working a bit harder to make a few more of those…..
Tammi, you are always welcome here. Chime away, anytime!
I had forgotten about that part. It seems so strange to have no one there to welcome them home. I know it happens. I just wish it didn't.
I will keep this in mind next time, and make sure that everyone is welcomed home.
Sometimes there will be volunteer "huggers" at the airport when the soldiers land. The one I heard about was a group of retired vets. It is amazing how people see a gap and fill it so nicely!
I'm not a military spouse either, but am a member of the Patriot Guard Riders. Invite us for any Welcome Homes. We LOVE them. Lots of noise, flags, and LOVE! And we make beelines for the single guys huddling together on the fringes. Love, love, love Welcome Homes. Of course our main mission is the protection of the families of our fallen, and the honoring of our fallen Heroes and their families. Welcome Homes, however are a very joyous occasion for us.
I loved that scene too…
I think what was also important was this past episode and the coverage of POW/MIA men&women.I cried through the whole funeral scene.But it is so important for people to know that not everyone comes home,and some bodies are never recovered except years later.
Driving on Ft.Monroe,VA this past Independence Day…I was so happy to see one high ranking house with a POW/MIA flag.
It is so very important that they are never forgotten.
I saw that scene as well. I was really affected, (i.e. crying like a baby) by it my bf will be returning to his post in Germany from Iraq in late Nov. and will have nobody to run and welcome him back. It breaks my heart, but it is wonderful to know that people will be there to welcome him and give him that hug for me I have been dying to give him.